NCAE’S again

so today we got the results of the long awaited NCAE’S [naional career assesment examination]. Most of the people were hyped about the results. most of them were jumping up and down saying “i knew it!” and fuckery like that. some were enlightened and stuff and yeah, good for them.

i, on the other hand, just held that stupid piece of paper in my hand, very close to tears.

results:

outdoor (1st)
  
     this means that you enjoy working with naturalistic environment such as plants and animals. Examples of which are the following: landscaping workers, pultry/dairy farmers, cattle ranchers, fishermen, agriculturists, horticulturists, agronomists, botanists, geologists and marine biologists.

first of all, HOW THE HELL DID I END UP WITH RESULTS LIKE THIS?!!? IS IT CUZ I KNOW PHYLUMS AND SHIT CUZ HELL. THIS SUCKS!

artistic (2nd)

    this means that you enjoy activites that look at the artistic side of things such as forms, designs and patterns. Examples: fashion design, interior decorators, graphic designers, landscape architecs, makeu artists, painters, sketch artists, poets/ lyricist, catoonists, photographers, musicians, singers, dancers, actors, directors, radio/ TV announcers.

this just left me very depressed.

cuz that’s usually how i tend to feel when i’m reminded of what i’m getting myself into.

depressed.

</3 [insert emo song here]

i mean, i’m not bummed cuz i’m completely against the results said. hey, i always wanted to be a vet and i love animals but it’s not that. the depressing part was knowing that the results of that test was exactly what i hoped it would be. it was telling me that i’m in a way, supposed to be what i really want to be. and no way is it even close to being a nurse like what i’m going to be in a few months.

worst thing about the whole is that, unlike some people in my batch, i’m never going to be able to convince my parents about paying for the course that i want and not nursing. but that’s not going to happen. and i’m extremely sad about it.

hoe hum.

btw, i got accepted to that college. here i come. 8-(

august 28, 2007
anyways,
about the NCAE’S idk, it honestly didn’t feel like a big deal to anyone or
everyone at my school but the whole test kinda felt like a REALLY big deal to
me. i mean, the whole time i was taking the test, i just kept thinking on and
on and on again that THIS was the test that could probably tell me what i’m
REALLY supposed to be. it was going to reflect what I was good at and i just
kept thinking that what if i’m supposed to be that one thing i really never
want to be or maybe something i never would have imagined myself becoming.
worst of all, what if the results of that single test would tell me that i’m
not supposed to be what i REALLY want to be.



fuckery.

anyways, i’m PMS stricken today and this is goin to go on for another 2 weeks or so. so watch out. and yes, me and james have been fighting again.

hje keeps telling me not to cheat on him and suff. iarghjgfdslja.

ok. i’m just really pissed right now. god.




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