so what’s up?

i really wanted to talk to him today and set the record straight between the two of us and clarify what we are and why we do the things we do if we both know that we can’t be together and if both of us are basically in it for nothing.
i wanted to know if we were going to work things out and actually start dating and in a few months proli come out of the open and start letting people see us together instead of whatever it is we’re doing now.
i wanted to know if i had a chance at actually having a relationship with someone again. but i don’t see that happening.
maybe i’ll just disappear and leave things like how they are now. if he wants me, he knows where to find me and maybe i’ll be there. maybe i won’t.

i’ve been really lonely lately with adrian in manila and me and kevin not talking so much anymore.

more lost then lonely actually.