you know you wouldn’t understand…

i don’t understand what’s wrong with me anymore. i feel so incompetent. I’m failing horribly at school and nothing is going right. i study and study and study but i still fail. I’m never enough. i feel like i’m not good enough or i’m not cut out to be a nurse after all. But it’s stupid because i know that i can be whatever i want because i used to be good at whatever i put my head into. I used to be someone who was smart and who made the right decisions but now i feel like i’m just floating around in this nothingness waiting for something big to happen when i know for sure it won’t.

i don’t understand why i keep failiing. I don’t get why i suck at everything i do. and most of all, i don’t know why i can’t stop thinking about you. I don’t know why when i’m supposed to be doing one thing i think about you and how scared i am to see you and how i’m scared that you might hurt me.

i wish there was some way i could escape you.

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