Because I Love You

I’m kind of a strong believer that we are who we are because of certain circumstances that occurred in our lives that caused us to be who we are today. My theory is that, in the middle of an ordinary day something extraordinary happened that changed us for what might be forever. But forever seems like such a long time so I might as well say for as long as we let it affect us. I do not like putting time periods on anything and forever does just that.

Let’s take my Yaya for example. She is terribly horrified of the thought of insects like roaches, worms or anything gross and slimmey. This is because when she was younger, her brothers would torment her with these creepy crawlies which eventually gave her nightmares. These nightmares, she carries with her until now and the very thought of these things scare the shit out of her.

Another is my sister, she knows very well to stay away from an eating dog. Once when she was 3, she went up to our dog, Poochy, who was in the middle of her meal which consisted mainly of bones and sardines [not something you should be feeding your dog on a daily basis, really] and all of a sudden, Poochy bit her on her leg. Because of that incident she had to get vaccines on multiple occasions which caused her not only to be more cautious of dogs in the middle of their meals but also made her terrible horrified of needles, injections and the like.

And me? I’m scared of falling in love. I’m mostly scared because I know what it’s like to give everything you can to someone who changes their mind. And that’s my story. But there are certain things that happen in your life on an ordinary day that seem to change everything. Mine was meeting you. And now I’m not so scared anymore.