Dear God, Allah, Budda and Lady Gaga…

Dear God,

I don’t like saying prayers in my head because writing it down let’s me think about my prayers more. Which is how I think most prayers should be like- more thought through. So tonight after much delay, I am going to pray to a God I believe in even though I tend to be sceptical at of at times.

First of all, I would like to thank you for all the good things that has come about from this catastrophe. Our family has been brought together and we have learned to seek one another. I guess for me, I learned the value of family and how I shouldn’t wait until it’s too late. When I think about Lolo, I don’t think I regret how I treated him because he knew I love him. I always told him that and in my heart, he is always going to be my chocolate man.

Thank you Lord for giving me a miracle today. I never knew that a simple grasping of a hand could mean so much to me. I never expected that the little things like that would ever matter to me but they do and thank you for that. I know that I’ve been so negative the past few days and most of that is due to my fear of change. I just think that it’s too risky of a time to involve myself in the changing lifestyle, you know? Of course you do.

I hope things get better from here on. I mean, I kinda believe it more than I hope for it. Lolo is strong and he always has been. That’s one thing I know about him. And that kinda makes things a little bit better…