dodging feelings

issa doesn’t care. issa likes to forget. issa likes to feel things that don’t really exist – she likes to live in her own little world where she’s proclaimed herself queen.

issa likes to create her own feelings, her own problems, her own diseases. issa likes to play with things that she doesn’t like and then dump then when she’s tired with em. well, it depends. issa likes to be weird. she thinks she’s normal like that.

she thinks about the future too much and what her children might be and what they might turn into. she likes to draw outfits that she plans to wear. she likes money. not other people’s money but hers. money that she’s earned fair and square. she wants to be a corporate something one day. she works for no one. no one.

she doesn’t like being alone all the time but enjoys her own presence. nowadays, she thinks that single is the only way to go. maybe she’ll never get married. poor her. poor dreams.

issa’s crazy but she loves referring to herself as the third person. she thinks she’s “cool” like that. hey, the world’s too big and superficial to categorize cool.

if she could, she’s spell his and her with those letter noodles. she thinks that would be fun. if she could, she’d keep him. although she doesn’t really know who “he” is right now.

she’s learned to much about the world in her 15 years of living. she’s aware and scared.

save her tonight. but make sure she wants you to. mahirap na ang kalaban.

pms. be afraid. be very afraid.