i aint’t shit

i’ve been feeling like absolute shit lately. i don’t even know what i’ve been running on anymore.

i’m unhappy. i’m uninspired. but i keep acting like i’ve got it all together. for who? i don’t need to fucking impress anyone at this point. i don’t have kids i need to pretend to be strong for. my husband doesn’t need me to be strong.

if i wanted to cry on the fucking bathroom floor, i could.

so here i am. lying in bed. just crying  my eyes out feeling like i’m never gonna be the person i need to be.

feeling like i’m a constant disappointment and like i ain’t shit.

it’s nice actually.

to be able to admit that to myself.